It's that time of the year...

I love the holidays.  I love being with family.  I love eating lots of yummy food.  I especially love eating lots of yummy desserts.  I love all the celebrations and festivities.  I love the decorations, the lights, the music.  I could go on...

However, the holidays also really stress me out.

I usually like to try to help with food in some way.  I like to make fun holiday food.  In recent years I typically make the mashed potatoes for my family's Thanksgiving (love them BTW) which isn't that much, but somehow I still stress.  Brandon & I used to decorate Christmas cookies for everyone, but recently I've only gotten around to making my pumpkin gingerbread because I get stressed out trying to find the time to do everything.  I love making these things, but for some reason, I let them also stress me out.

I also stress majorly about gifts.  I always want to give the perfect gift to each person.  We've always been on a budget, but this year we are REALLY on a budget now that we are down to 1 income, and it's totally stressing me out.  I know that buying expensive things isn't necessarily the perfect gift (unless it's for my hubby - ha!).  But, I hold myself to this idea that I can come up with something thoughtful, creative, something that each person will just love, and relatively inexpensive.  Ultimately though, every year I fail (at least in my mind).  I might find a couple people gifts like that, but for most, I end up having to just get something that I'm not completely satisfied or I spend outside what we set for our budget.  I know it's ridiculous to expect to find the perfect gift for everyone.  For me, gifts aren't about what you're actually getting.  It truly is the thought that counts.  I don't know how others feel - they may feel the same way or they may actually care about what the gift is.  Because it's the thought that counts to me, I tend to want to give gifts in that manner as well, but since I don't really know how the people I'm giving it to feel, I stress over whether it's right or not.  Yes, I am aware that I shouldn't make such a big deal, but somehow I can't seem to do that.  (And for any family reading this - I hope this doesn't make me look terrible/crazy/etc.  My blog is somewhat of a place for me to not only share the fun things, it's also a place for me to reflect, and to vent.  Maybe just putting it in words will help me to stress less - ha!)

And this year, there's the added stress/excitement of Logan's 1st birthday.  We are only going to do a small family thing, so we are trying to keep it simple and costs low, but I also have visions of what I want it to be like - and they all take time and money.  Neither of which, I have much of.  I know Logan won't remember any of it, but I still feel like everything needs to be perfect, go smoothly, etc.  I know that won't happen, but I still seem to hold myself to ridiculous standards.

I started this post about 2 weeks ago, but am just now getting around to finishing it.  It may seem weird, but I think it didn't get finished because God needed to show me something first.  I read this blog post tonight, which helped to show me I'm not alone and to give me some perspective.  I especially like the quote at the end from this blog "Whenever Christmas begins to burden, it’s a sign that I’ve taken on something of the world and not of Christ. Any weight in Christmas has to be of this world."

So my goal in all of this, is to try to step back, not get so stressed, and enjoy the holidays for what they are meant to be - like being thankful for the things I have at Thanksgiving (thankful that I am physically & financially able to make the mashed potatoes no matter how they come out - ha!), remembering the true meaning for Christmas (Christ is the gift so what we give, really doesn't matter), and celebrating the past year that I have had with my sweet boy (we aren't guaranteed tomorrow - so each day, week, month, year that we have together is precious). 

A Month of Thankfulness

This past month, in honor of Thanksgiving, a lot of people were posting one thing a day that they were thankful for on Facebook.  I, too, decided I would join in.  I also wanted to have all of them in one place so that I could go back and remind myself of all of my blessings during those times when things are down, and I need reminders of God's love, faithfulness and blessings.  So, here is my 30 days of Thanksgiving...

Day 1 - I am thankful for a gracious God who loves me, sent his Son to die in my place, and forgives me of my sins.

Day 2 - I am thankful for a husband who loves me even when I'm crazy and/or irrational or just plain annoying - ha! He is also my best friend and a wonderful father. I love him and am so thankful that God gave him to me :)

Day 3 - I am thankful for Logan and the joy that he has brought into our lives. He is an answer to prayer and everyday I thank God for blessing us with him. The love I have for him is indescribable and something that I've never felt or experienced before. Oh and have you seen his pictures? He's pretty stinkin' cute too - just like his Daddy ;-)

Day 4 - I am thankful for my Mom & Dad who loved/love me even when I was/am difficult, provided for me, taught me about the love of Christ, and helped shape me into the person I am today.

Day 5 - I am thankful for my sister.  She has always tried to look out for me and take care of me.  At times when I was younger, I may not have appreciated the "mothering" so much, but I am so thankful that she cared/cares enough about me to try to take care of me.  And, now that we are both one income families, she is helping me to adjust to a new budget.  I'm very blessed to have her!

Day 6 - I am thankful for my mother-in-law and father-in-law. I know this is not something everyone can say, so I try my best not to take them for granted. Long before Brandon and I were even married, they made me feel like such a special part of the family (and still do).

Day 7 - Today, on Logan's 11 month birthday, I am thankful for the opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom.  Because of this, I get to spend lots of time with my sweet boy, go to the women's bible study & MOPs at my church, and do things for my family that I didn't have the time/energy to do before.  Today I have played with Logan, vacuumed, swept & mopped my floors, made red beans & rice w/ sausage for dinner, went to the grocery story, made pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, and washed all the dishes (Oh and I did get to shower too - ha!).  I'm exhausted, but I am sooo happy :)

Day 8 - I am thankful for my 2 brother-in-laws, and my sister-in-law.  I sure wish they all lived closer though!  They are great additions to my family and I am so glad that Logan has such wonderful people to be his aunts & uncles.  We always have fun together and I hope that as the years go on, no matter what the physical distance may be between us - we'll always be close.

Day 9 - I am thankful for my friends.  The ones that have been around a while, the new ones, and all the ones in between.  Whether you're a lifetime friend or a friend for a season, I appreciate your friendship.  God has a way of sending us just the right people for the right times.

Day 10 - I am thankful for my extended family & extended inlaws. Even though my family is all over the country, I always enjoy our time together. Fortunately, my in-laws are mostly all here, and I really enjoy all the family get-togethers and how they all (I think - ha!) love me as if I was one of their own :)

Day 11 - I am thankful for my freedom and for the ability to worship my God without persecution and for the men and women who serve and have served to protect that freedom & right. Happy Veterans Day!

Day 12 - I am thankful for my Bunco Babes. It's more than just about having fun together. I feel like we are our own little bunco family. Our group has been through so much the last few years and everyone is so supportive of each other. I am so thankful for all of you!

Day 13 - I am thankful for Logan's kisses! He started leaning in for kisses about a month ago, but in the last week has started consistently giving kisses. It is the sweetest thing ever! He is such a sweet boy!

Day 14 - I am thankful for my health!

Day 15 - Today, on my birthday, I am thankful for the 28 years God has given me.  We aren't guaranteed tomorrow, and I pray that I am living for Him today.  This past year has probably been the best year of my life.  I am so thankful for the wonderful family that I have and hope to enjoy many more years together!

Day 16 - I am thankful for my couples small group (bible study). I am so blessed to have some other wonderful couples to go through this crazy life together! AND - tonight we are having a Thanksgiving potluck at my house. It's going to be delicious. Yum, yum! :)

Day 17 - I am thankful for my husband's job.  It  is a great work environment, so he doesn't come home stressed, and it provides for our family.  Such a blessing!

Day 18 - Today, on this day of Aggie bonfire remembrance, I am thankful that I had the opportunity to go to college. And not just any college. Texas A&M - one that prides itself on excellence, integrity, leadership, loyalty, respect & selfless service. There really is a spirit that can ne'er be told...So proud to be an Aggie!

Day 19 - I am thankful for my home. Not only am I blessed enough just to have it, but I happen to think it's beautiful and has all our family needs and more.

Day 20 - I am thankful that my Grandma is here to visit Logan & meet Maryellen for the first time. I am also thankful that on this day 12 years ago, God chose to spare my Grandma's, my Grandpa's and my Mom's lives as they were hit by a drunk driver going 60+ while they were stopped at a stop light. Not everyone is that fortunate. I also want to urge all of you to remember to be responsible when drinking - don't drive, and don't let your friends & family drive when they have been drinking.

Day 21 - I am thankful for my MOPs small group. I am really enjoying making new mommy friends and our mentor mom is the sweetest! I had such a good time tonight at our "girls night out" and look forward to our next meeting/get together!

Day 22 - I am thankful for answered prayers.

Day 23 - I am thankful for prayers that seem unanswered, aren't the answer we were looking for, or are maybe even a no because in the big picture of it all - HIS way is the best way. We may not understand it right away, or maybe not even until we see His face in Heaven, but God loves us and knows what is best for us.

Day 24 - Happy Thanksgiving! Today, not only am I thankful for all that I have already posted, but I am thankful for food! Lots and lots of yummy food! It also makes me think about those that don't, however. Praying today for those that do not have food to feed themselves & their families.

Day 25 - This might seem silly, but - I am thankful for sleep (and a baby that has been pretty good at sleeping from day 1). I don't always get as much of it as I want/need, but when I do get it, it sure is wonderful.

Day 26 - I am thankful that God has given us the knowledge and resources of modern medicine. It is amazing what we can do with it.

Day 27 - I am thankful for my heater. I am NOT a fan of cold weather, so I am thankful that I can turn on my heater and be nice and cozy and warm :)

Day 28 - I am thankful that sometimes Logan still lets me rock him to sleep. I know that these days will not last forever, so I cherish each moment. I just can't help sometimes but to sit there and rock him even after he's asleep and just stare at his sweet face. I love him so much!!

Day 29 - I am thankful for my puppies. Until Logan came along, they were my babies. Even though they're not my babies anymore, I still love them (except when they do gross things - ha!). They are so sweet with Logan, and Logan just ADORES them.

Day 30 - I am thankful for the way God gives us gentle reminders that He is in control.  His way is always the best, and if we would just trust in Him, things would be so much better.  This can be soooo hard sometimes.

Logan's 1st Halloween

I'm excited about the holiday season, especially now that we have Logan.  I am looking forward to all the new family traditions we will make for our own little family.  I think it will be fun to blend some of each of our families' and create some new ones all our own.

I'm not sure what our traditions for Halloween will be as our families were pretty different with their Halloween traditions and each year we've been married it seems like we do something different.

My side of the family has never really been huge celebrators of Halloween.  We did some dressing up and trick-or-treating when we were little, but later switched to having a special movie night on Halloween.  In Brandon's family it was celebrated a little more and they dressed up and trick-or-treated each year.  I think we'll just take it a year at a time and decide from there.  It sure is fun to dress a baby up, and ogle over just how cute he is :)

(Excuse the toys everywhere - I didn't bother to clean up before taking the picture)

Logan is wearing his Daddy's costume, that was hand sewn for him by his grandma - Mimi (Logan's great grandma).  Brandon was 13 months when he wore it and Logan is almost 11, so they are pretty close in age (although Logan's big head, almost didn't fit - ha!). Here are their pics.  Aren't they the cutest?

It almost looks like the same child, huh?  Brandon can't ever deny that Logan is his child.  Not that he would want to ever deny that such a cute, handsome, smart, athletic, well-behaved and talented child is his - ha! ;)

This year, since Logan isn't really old enough to get the concept of trick-or-treating, and he can't have the candy, and we certainly don't need the candy, we opted not to go trick-or-treating in our neighborhood (although we still ended up with a ton of candy because Brandon took a bunch from his parents - ha! Oh well).

Even though my family doesn't make a big deal of Halloween, I decided to give them a surprise visit yesterday.  We went during the day because they weren't going to be home last night (they take dance lessons - If you have never had the pleasure of getting to watch them, I just thought I'd let you know they are really good :) ).  My Dad was at work and that is on the way to my parent's house, so we stopped there first.  Logan did great and even let me put his headband on without pulling it off (at home when I had tried to take pictures, he wouldn't leave it on).  We surprised Papa, had fun playing at his office, and then headed to my parents house.

I had intended to show up, ring the door bell and say "Trick or Treat" to my Mom, but as luck would have it, she had gone to run errands (but we didn't know this) after her morning class that she teaches, so she wasn't home.

So...Logan, Papa and I had lunch while we tried to get in touch with Grandma.  She made it home right before we had to leave for Logan's nap, so he got to see her for a little bit, but was not as cooperative for picture time.  However, my Dad did get a picture of my Mom showing Logan how to give kisses and I think if you look closely, it looks like Logan is trying to copy her.

After Brandon got home from work, we loaded up the car and headed to Gigi & Poppy's house to surprise them too.  We rang their doorbell and Gigi answered with a bowl of candy thinking we were their first trick-or-treaters.  She screamed and Poppy quickly realized what was going on and came to share in the excitement.

While we were on that side of town we also stopped by to surprise Mawmaw & Pawpaw (Logan's great-grandparents), and one of his Great Aunts & Great Uncles (We didn't get any pictures of any of these visits because it was just a quick stop and I didn't think about it).

I think it's pretty safe to say that the grandparents were surprised and loved getting to see their little "Indian" boy.

Happy Halloween from the Todds!!