I'm going to warn you some of this may be too much information for some of you, however, I want to document as much as possible, as I know I won't be able to remember all the details as the years go by and I'd really love to have something to look back on. So if you're not interested in details, then you probably don't want to read this post :)
Those of you that have been following the blog know that I've been having a fair amount of contractions since 30 weeks. Well the 2 weeks leading up to my due date I was having even more contractions. A few times I even thought it could be the beginnings of labor, but each time they would subside. I started thinking maybe I was going to be pregnant forever. Ha!
Well my due date came & went, and I kept having more signs that labor would be (hopefully) beginning soon. At about 4:30ish the morning of the 21st I woke up with some contractions that were beginning to feel a little bit painful. This had happened before so I wasn't sure yet, but was hopeful. By about 4:45 I realized they were more painful and were coming fairly quickly so I started timing them. After a few, I determined they were coming 5 minutes a part. The time in which my doctor recommended we head to the hospital. I woke Brandon up, then called my parents. At this point I wasn't sure what to do about Logan. I didn't want to wake him up, and I really hated to call my sister so early. After talking with my parents we decided they would come, my Dad would stay, and my mom would ride with us. My Dad would come later after we got to the hospital and determined how things were progressing.
This next part will probably make many people laugh, but when my parents arrived, I was not ready to go because I was putting make-up on. I know, this is totally out of character for me. However, I know with babies comes pictures, and childbirth isn't exactly the most beautiful thing, so a girl has to do what a girl has to do to feel pretty enough to allow pictures. Ha!
By the time we left contractions had become about 3 minutes apart. It took us probably 35-40 minutes to get to the hospital and when we got there they were definitely getting closer together and stronger. I was sent to triage where they monitored and checked me. I was between 5-6 cm. They then checked with my doctor and I was admitted. It was rather hectic because it was shift change time so my triage nurse had to help out who would become my labor and delivery nurse. I wish I could remember the triage nurse's name, but my labor & delivery nurse was Jennifer. Once I was in the room & everything was set up, my doctor came in. I'm guessing it was around 8:15, but I honestly don't remember. At this point I wasn't sure I wanted an epidural. My doctor said I needed to deliver by noon because she was leaving then, and wanted to start me on Pitocin to speed things up. Since I've heard terrible things about how bad it makes the contractions and I had not yet decided on an epidural, I said I'd rather not have it and if she wasn't the one to deliver that would be ok. She broke my water and then left.
After she broke my water, holy cow, the pain went from manageable to ridiculous. I then told the nurse I'd like that epidural. However, the anesthesiologist was about to go into a C-section, so I would have to wait. My nurse did call him to let him know we wanted him as soon as he was done. However, within the next 30 minutes I had progressed to an 8 and things were moving so fast I realized that the likelihood of an epidural was slim. I asked my nurse if it was too late and I don't remember exactly what she said, but I could tell from the look on her face that it was indeed too late.
The pain only got worse from there and as much as I'd like to say I was calm and it was a piece of cake and I never screamed, that was not at all the case. I don't consider myself a loud or dramatic person and as much as I wanted to not scream during the contracts/labor/delivery, it is just forced out of you. I, seriously, in my head was saying "I don't want to scream, this is so embarrassing, but OMG I can't help it, it's just coming." I remember apologizing to Brandon on multiple occasions because I was afraid I was making him uncomfortable. I didn't want him to worry about me, I didn't want him to feel bad that he honestly could do nothing. He was trying to be encouraging and reminding me to breath, but at one point I just couldn't take it and told him to stop breathing on me. I tried to (at least in my head) say it in as nice a way as possible, but I honestly don't remember how it came out. Brandon may remember it differently, but hopefully I wasn't too harsh. Ha!
Not too long after I was 8 centimeters I remember feeling like I just HAD to push. The nurse checked me again but I was still an 8 and she told me not to push. It was the weirdest feeling. The baby was just pushing down and I felt like I needed to keep pushing her out. This feeling continued until I could actually push. It took what felt like forever, but really probably wasn't more than 30 minutes. Finally, when I got close, they called my doctor. We had a little problem with the last little bit of dilating as some of my cervix just wouldn't open enough, so when my doctor came she had to help Abigail past that (or at least that's what I assume, I honestly have no idea what she did).
This next part may have TMI, but I want to document it anyway (so feel free to skip it)...When my doctor arrived I told her I was worried I was going to have a bowel movement. I was super concerned about having a bowel movement in front of my hubby & everyone, so when it was time to push, I was trying to push in a way that wouldn't allow that to happen, and I don't know why I thought I could push a baby out and hold everything else in. After my first try pushing, my doctor looked at me and said something along the lines of "You're not doing anything. Screaming isn't pushing. You can't worry about a bowel movement, you've got to push and get her out." I think she may have also said something along the lines of the baby isn't liking this (later learned the cord was wrapped around her neck like her big brother). That got me over my fears and I just pushed as hard as I could. At some point I did have an episiotomy and as horrible as I thought that would be it was just mixed in with all the other pain and I'm not sure I really "felt" it. I think it took 3 contractions and then she was born. I had forgotten that my doctor told me when my water had broken that there was meconium in my water, so NICU would have to take her right away (still in my room though) to assess her lungs to make sure none of it had gotten into her lungs. My doctor put her finger in Abigail's mouth as soon as she was born, so she wouldn't breath and possibly get some in her lungs. But, because of this, she didn't cry when she was born and I immediately was concerned and said "She isn't crying" - about to cry myself out of worry when my doctor reminded me it was because she put her finger in her mouth and I then remembered she had told me that would happen.
While the NICU nurses/doctor/whoever assessed her, my doctor had to stitch & finish things up with me. Last time, with the epidural, I didn't even know what was going on, but this time, unfortunately it was just more discomfort/pain. Not as much as the labor/delivery, but still - not fun. I just wanted to be done. I just wanted to hold my baby. Once the NICU assessed Abigail they determined all was well. It was really just a few minutes before I got to hold Abigail on my chest. At that point, all else melted away and I honestly don't remember much after that. However, I do remember that my reaction to getting to hold her wasn't as emotional as when Logan was born. Not to say I wasn't as happy to have Abigail, and at first I felt bad that I didn't have the same reaction, but honestly, I just think that due to the different situation, the ability to really realize and process what just happened wasn't there. I think I was in a little bit of shock. Ha! It all happened so fast there wasn't really time for emotion.
After the doctor was finished with everything, I was able to nurse Abigail. At some point, I honestly don't remember when, Brandon went to tell family that she was here.
Once we had some family time, it was time for her bath. We invited the rest of our family in and Logan got to meet his sister. He gave her a present and she "gave" him one as well. He was very quiet at first, but seemed curious about her. I'm not sure he really knew what to think. He was definitely very interested in her when she cried though. He would always stop what he was doing to go see her.
They did not weigh & measure her until this point and we found out she was 9 pounds 8.4 ounces and 20 3/4 inches long. Ouch! That explains A LOT! Ha! No wonder I had such a giant belly.
My father-in-law left shortly after this for work stuff and my parents left with Logan around his nap time so he could get one and not melt down. My father-in-law came back later as he never got his turn to hold Abigail. After, my mother-in-law went to pick up Logan & Brandon & my father-in-law went to get celebratory wings for dinner. My Dad came back by that evening to bring us some stuff and see Abigail one more time before he had to head to East Texas for a fishing trip. My sister, brother-in-law and niece also came to visit us that evening. It was a long, busy, but wonderful day!
The first night was a little different than our first night with Logan. He would sleep for a little while, nurse and then sleep some more. The nurses were the ones that kept me from sleeping the first night with Logan. With Abigail, she had a period of time where she seriously wanted to nurse for 2 hours straight. I thought I might die. Ha! I called my nurse out of desperation and she recommended the pacifier and some warm blankets. I was a little hesitant the first night to already give her a pacifier, but she had been latching fine, and I was desperate, so we gave it a try and she gave us a good 2-3 hours. It was wonderful. Thankfully the next time she nursed we had no problems from her use of the paci. It is now our best friend just like with Logan. Ha! I also want to mention that my night nurse was Michelle and she was my favorite nurse, probably even of all the nurses I had with Logan too. She was so very sweet, and very helpful too.
The next morning my doctor came back to check on me and she asked me if I wanted to go home or stay and of course I picked go home. I was so glad she gave me the option again. We just had to wait for the pediatrician to check out Abigail again and give us her approval to go home and then we'd be able to leave. My in-laws had kept Logan for the night, and they brought him back to see us again, and my mom also came to visit. We didn't have any other visitors as we weren't there long and our hospital isn't very close to most of our friends.
We got to leave around 4, so we spent less than 36 hours in the hospital (also random side note - they don't make you leave in a wheel chair anymore. It was kind of weird just walking out with her, but then again, I felt weirder having to be wheeled out with Logan. Ha!). However, since it was a Friday, it was just in time for traffic. Yay! Fortunately it wasn't too terrible yet, but we still would have rather not had any. We just wanted to be home. It was a little weird when we got home because Logan wasn't there, and no family or friends came by, but it was also kind of nice to just have a little family time with the 3 of us.
Since it's been so long, I honestly don't remember much about our first night. I don't think she was quite as good of a sleeper as Logan, but I do remember it was better than our night in the hospital.
It was such a crazy experience, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. It is how we got our sweet girl and she is so worth it. I'd do it again in a heartbeat! I love her so very much.!! She will never really know the extent, but hopefully one day she will be a momma and have a little bit of an idea just how much I love her.
